Sunday, April 25, 2010

More Meekness in Trial: Guest Nola Bird

"The Lord is good, a strong hold in the day of trouble; and he knoweth them that trust in him." Nahum 1:7

We believe that God does know us - individually, specifically. In our various personal trials, we have felt his love envelop us in peace. The kind that passeth understanding.

That is not to say that trials don't occasionally feel heavy. They do. Life is hard for each of us in various, vastly different ways.

In our own quest for greater trust in the Lord, and "more patience in suffering," we truly appreciate the examples of others who bear their personal trials with trust and true meekness. We'd like to occasionally use this forum to post such stories - stories of people facing difficult trials with great faith and, consequently, great hope.

We hope you'll contact us (wesandlori@gmail.com) if you'd ever like to write such a post. (Elder Maxwell said, "Hope can be contagious." Isn't that true??!")

Today's contribution is by our dear friend Nola Bird. Nola is a friend we long admired and appreciated, although we never really had an opportunity to become deeply acquainted. Nola was consistently interested in us, unusually observant of our particular challenges, and always ready with a sensitive comment. I didn't realize until Nola moved a distance away that her empathy sprang from significant personal loss. We're grateful she chose to share a little of her experiences today:

My life changed 18 years ago this August. On a Monday evening, my Mom, 2 brothers and I were enjoying a family night. As we were enjoying this quiet summer evening, my grandparents showed up. They struggled to tell us that my Dad was in a deadly airplane crash in Wisconsin. That was a defining moment in my life, but it was definitely not the end of my world. I was sad and probably a little confused, but I knew that through the Gospel of Jesus Christ I could have hope that life was going to be ok and one day I would see my Dad again.

Let me backup and try to explain where this knowledge came from. I believe that part of my nature is to accept things that require faith relatively easily, but I also believe my family was prepared for this moment. Two of my brothers were born with genetic disorders that shortened their lives considerably. My older brother lived to be 16 and actually died two years after my Dad. One of my younger brothers died after living just 12 hours. Once my parents found out about this genetic disorder they taught me consistently about the Plan of Salvation. They taught me to rely on the Lord and believe that His will is something I can always trust. At the age of 3 I told my church teacher “My brother is going to die, but that is ok because he is going to live with Jesus.”

Since these tragedies/opportunities I have thought a lot about faith and hope. Recently, I was reading a talk by Elder Pino (who happens to be one of my husband’s mission presidents…random, but it kind of connects to my next thought.) printed in the May 2009 Ensign. He discussed faith in adversity. He talked about a friend that faced the loss of 5 family members in an automobile accident. This man, Brother Quero, had a wonderful outlook on what is important. Shortly after the accident he told Elder Pino: “This was the time to show loyalty to God and to acknowledge that we depend on Him, that His will must be obeyed, and that we are subject to Him. I spoke to my brothers and gave them strength and courage to understand what President Kimball taught many years ago, that ‘there is no tragedy in death, but only in sin’ (Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Spencer W. Kimball [Melchizedek Priesthood and Relief Society course of study, 2006], 18) and that the important thing is not how a man died but how he lived.”

I love what President Kimball said. I have a friend who is related to my mission president by marriage. My mission president had so many health struggles while on his mission. Then when he got home he was diagnosed with cancer of the throat and he also had a hip replacement (he might have gone through more, but I can’t remember). My friend questioned God’s will for my mission president. He would often say to me “He (my mission president) did so much good in this life, why does he have to go through all these health struggles?” It's easy to wonder those things, but it broke my heart to hear my friend talk this way. I know my mission president’s attitude was one of trusting in the Lord and moving forward.

Almost 2 years ago, my mission president past away. His wife is healthy will probably live for quiet a while without him. I imagine she will get lonely, but I think her attitude is similar to that of Elder Scott’s. In the May 2009 Ensign he said “Fourteen years ago the Lord took my wife beyond the veil. I love her with all my heart, but I have never complained because I know it was His will. I have never asked why but rather what is it that He wants me to learn from this experience. I believe that is a good way to face the unpleasant things in our lives, not complaining but thanking the Lord for the trust He places in us when He gives us the opportunity to overcome difficulties.”

No matter how tough life gets, the Lord is there to provide us the strength to get through. He wants us to succeed. We may have a plan for how we want life to go, but He is the one that knows how to mold us into our best self. He is the one that sees the end from the beginning.

As far as I can remember, I have never questioned why major trials have occurred in my life. I miss my Dad and 2 brothers, but I know I have been given the chance to become a better person. I know those losses have made me a little more compassionate, a little less stubborn and a little more humble. Don’t worry; I also know I still have a long way to go in each of those categories. I hope that I can make my life more Christ-like with out another major trial in my life, but if they do come, I hope I will be able to remember what President Howard W. Hunter said. “If our lives and our faith are centered on Jesus Christ and his restored gospel, nothing can ever go permanently wrong. On the other hand, if our lives are not centered on the Savior and his teachings, no other success can ever be permanently right” (The Teachings of Howard W. Hunter, ed. Clyde J. Williams [1997], 40).

I know that as I am centered on Jesus Christ, my life is good! I also know that the same can be true for everyone. We all have the opportunity to be happy and content. If you are not feeling that way currently now is a great time to reevaluate how you can focus more on the Savior and strengthen your faith in God’s will for you. I am grateful to the Lord for allowing me to feel the pain of loss. I am grateful to the Lord for placing His trust in me every time I am faced with a difficult challenge. As a result of these struggles I can see I am a better person than I would have been without.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Personal Ministry Part II: More of the Same

I remember one particular Christmas season during my high school years. I remember sitting around a cozy fire in my parent's living room and listening to the First Presidency Christmas Devotional with a few of my dearest girlfriends. I remember my heart filling with love as I listened to President Hinckley deliver a characteristically inspiring, heart warming message. I remember talking with my friends after the devotional, discussing our mutual love and appreciation for the prophet. I remember that we wanted to tell him. Somehow.

"Let's buy him a tie!" Someone said.
We all laughed, but somehow the suggestion became serious.
"Lets buy him a tie and write him a note!"
We were determined.
But it didn't take long for the eager feelings of that evening to dissipate. We felt too silly. We got too busy. We never bought a tie or sent a note.

I wish we had. And I think wistfully about that scenario every time I read or listen to Sister Parkin's 2007 devotional address (I read and re-read, listen and re-listen to this talk. It's wonderful.)

Personal Ministry: Sacred and Precious

Sister Parkin begins by recounting the story of a woman who, spontaneously and with love, sewed a tie for President Kimball when he was the prophet. She went to his home to deliver it, but felt suddenly silly when Sister Kimball opened the door.

"Stumbling all over herself, Susan said, 'I saw President Kimball in his new suit on Sunday. Dad just brought me some silk from New York . . . and so I made him a tie.'

Before Susan could continue, Sister Kimball stopped her, took hold of her shoulders, and said: 'Susan, never suppress a generous thought.'”

I don't think we should all buy and make ties for the prophet.
But don't you love that idea of acting more consistently on generous impulses?!

I grew up hearing my mother's voice recite the lines President Monson quoted in last November's conference:

I have wept in the night
For the shortness of sight
That to somebody’s need made me blind;
But I never have yet
Felt a tinge of regret
For being a little too kind.

"Never suppress a generous thought."

Now let's hop over to the New Testament again. Matthew 25. Just a few verses after the parable of the talents we discussed last week.

"Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: For I was an hungered, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in: Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me."

Familiar verses. Beautiful images of ministering and compassion. Images that, in my mind, have always been coupled with scenes of poverty and suffering. Which is intended, right? We ought to consider the hungry, the thirsty, the stranger - at home and abroad. We ought to feed, water, and welcome destitute folks. We ought to give and donate and relieve. Yes!

But after pondering the parable of the talents and considering the idea of individual stewardship over souls, these familiar verses took on added meaning as well. I began to see how they applied directly to my immediate spheres of influence.

My children's faces came to mind as I read "For I was an hungered and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink."

And I saw the temple when I read, "I was in prison, and ye came unto me." (Our neighbor and friend Brian Kershisnik was the first to help me connect those two ideas. How beautiful, no?)

As I read, the Spirit helped me to feel greater purpose in my current roles (like motherhood) and helped me to see more opportunities to minister in my seemingly small spheres of influence.
"Do small things with great love," said Mother Teresa (as quoted in Sis. Parkin's talk).
And "by small and simple things are great things brought to pass." Alma 37: 6

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Personal Ministry: Part I (Some Assembly Required)

A few days before last weekend's General Conference, I read in Third Nephi:
"Behold, [Jesus] stretched forth his hand unto the multitude, and cried unto them, saying: Blessed are ye if ye shall give heed unto the words of these twelve whom I have chosen from among you to minister unto you, and to be your servants."

Well timed, no?

Every conference talk begs discussion. Every talk.
But today I want to discuss the idea of ministry implied in Christ's words above.

We often talk of the Savior's ministry. How he "went about doing good." How he healed bodies, lifted burdens, washed feet, and attended to individuals one by one. He commissioned his apostles to minister in the same way - as "servants" and stewards. And it seems obvious that he expects a similar ministry from each of his followers:

"By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another." John 13: 34-35

This isn't a new idea.
I know.
But it's an idea that has been clarified and emphasized in my life and reading recently and I want to write a few thoughts down.

I'm not going to try very hard to make a point.
You'll have to take these piecemeal ponderings for what they're worth, assemble them as you will, and then prepare yourself for Part II - More of the Same - which is coming next week.

(All that being said: good luck!)

Have you ever read Carol Lynn Pearson's poem The Steward? It describes a man whose father entrusts him with a piece of land and, teaching him about stewardship, says:

"When...we get together again
I'm going to call you to account
I'm going to say 'Heber did you make it more
Than you found it? Did you watch it
And tend it? Did you make it grow?
Is it everything it can be?
That's what I'll want to know."

Heber lives true to his Father's commission, and spends his life improving the land.
But Heber also had a wife. A wife who played the violin. Music was her passion. And after several years of practicing (performing only twice a year in church), Margaret was invited to join the town symphony. And she was thrilled.

But Heber said no.

Margaret promised to wake up at four a.m. to accommodate the extra commitment. She vowed she wouldn't let her household duties or her hungry babies suffer neglect.

But Heber said no.
For various, reasonable sounding reasons.

She...seemed to take it all right,
Though she was quieter than usual
And more and more an afternoon would pass
Without her practicing.

Eventually she gave up her playing altogether and the violin grew dusty on a shelf. In old age, as the couple prepared to move from their home:
[Margaret] slowly made her way to the porch
And put the violin with the things
For the children to sort through.
"Will any of them remember?
I don't think so."

At the same time,
Heber gave one last look at his lands
And he was pleased
He could face his father with a clear mind
"Here's my stewardship," he would say
"And I think you'll find
I did everything you asked
I took what you gave me - and I made it more.

A heartbreaking, thought-provoking poem. A great lesson that our stewardship over souls is more important than our stewardship over...well, anything else.

I remembered Heber and Margaret while I was doing a little pre-Easter reading in Matthew last week. Among other things, I read about the servants and their talents (you know, "unto one he gave five talents, to another two, and to another one").

I've always chalked that parable up as a nice, "neglect not the gift that is in thee" lesson. Which I think it is. I believe the Lord expects us to cultivate our personal abilities and talents and gifts. But with thoughts of stewardship and ministry on my mind, last week's reading brought an additional interpretation: couldn't the Master's gift of "talents" also represent a gift of trust over souls? Couldn't talents mean our children? Our spouses? Our neighbors and friends? "Unto one he gave five...to another two, and to another one." Some of us have large spheres of influence, and some of us have small. Spheres certainly overlap and change over time. But don't we ultimately believe that God will hold us accountable for how we have (or have not) increased the value and built up the worth of the souls in our various stewardships? Couldn't that be part of this parable? A command to invest in each other?

I love what the Lord says to John Whitmer in Doctrine and Covenants 15:

"For many times you have desired of me to know that which would be of the most worth unto you. ... And now, behold, I say unto you, that the thing which will be of the most worth unto you will be to declare repentance unto this people, that you may bring souls unto me, that you may rest with them in the kingdom of my Father. Amen."

And amen.

More musing on this subject next week...
Cheerio!

Sunday, April 4, 2010

The Greatest Reality

"I think of how dark that Friday was when Christ was lifted up on the cross. ...

On that Friday the Savior of mankind was humiliated and bruised, abused and reviled.

It was a Friday filled with devastating, consuming sorrow that gnawed at the souls of those who loved and honored the Son of God.

I think that of all the days since the beginning of this world’s history, that Friday was the darkest.

But the doom of that day did not endure.

The despair did not linger because on Sunday, the resurrected Lord burst the bonds of death. He ascended from the grave and appeared gloriously triumphant as the Savior of all mankind.

And in an instant the eyes that had been filled with ever-flowing tears dried. The lips that had whispered prayers of distress and grief now filled the air with wondrous praise, for Jesus the Christ, the Son of the living God, stood before them as the firstfruits of the Resurrection, the proof that death is merely the beginning of a new and wondrous existence.

Each of us will have our own Fridays—those days when the universe itself seems shattered and the shards of our world lie littered about us in pieces. We all will experience those broken times when it seems we can never be put together again. We will all have our Fridays.

But I testify to you in the name of the One who conquered death—Sunday will come. In the darkness of our sorrow, Sunday will come.

No matter our desperation, no matter our grief, Sunday will come. In this life or the next, Sunday will come.

I testify to you that the Resurrection is not a fable."

Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin, "Sunday will Come," October 2006

Happy Easter!

Thursday, April 1, 2010

For Your Easter Celebration

My dear friend Deanna e-mailed me these wonderful thoughts/ideas last night! Couldn't wait until Sunday to share! Use some of these great ideas this year and file some away for next!

Spring is my favorite season and Easter my favorite holiday. So, I became deliriously happy when I found the book A Christ-Centered Easter three years ago when I was pregnant with my first baby. It was also the first Easter my husband and I were celebrating as a married couple and it seemed appropriate to solidify some Easter traditions for our new family.


First off, I must say that understanding the Passover in greater depth will enrich your Easter celebrations. That same Easter that I found the book, my husband and I attended a Passover Seder service at BYU. If you don't live near Provo, check your local Jewish synagogue, you don't have to be Jewish to attend. To prepare ourselves for the service we read Exodus chapters 1-14 and watched The Prince of Egypt.

In A Christ-Centered Easter, the author gives daily activities:

Day 1- Palm Sunday, Jesus' Triumphal Entry

• Make palms branches out of cardboard (for the spines) and green paper. Read "Palms for the Lord," (from the Friend, March 1996).

• Act out the Triumphal Entry using the palm branches and discuss the meaning of the word Hosanna and why we shout it at temple dedications (See BD, "Hosanna" and JTC Chapter 29, Note 8). Discuss what your family would do to show your joy that Jesus is the Christ if he came today.

• Go on a nature walk. Find branches to represent the palm branches cast into the Savior's path as he rode a donkey into Jerusalem; a thorn to represent the crown of thorns Jesus wore on his head; a piece of wood to signify the cross, a nail, a rock to represent the stone rolled away from the open tomb, etc.

• Choose both a Resurrection hymn and an Atonement hymn to learn during the week.

• Make a story line of pictures to display on your wall, mantel, or bookshelf as a visual reminder of the Easter story. Each day add a new picture that corresponds with the events of that day; or display the entire Easter story in pictures at once. Try using pictures from the Gospel Art Kit or pictures from various issues of the Ensign.

Day 2- Monday, Cleansing The Temple

• Put Easter story cutout figures (cutout set 8, #33248, Church Distribution) in a hat. Have children draw out a figure and place it in chronological order on a flannel board as you tell the Easter story.

• Make up hand motions for Easter Primary songs.

Day 3- Tuesday, Parables and Teachings

• Discuss the definition of the word parable and why Jesus used parables as a teaching method.

• Play parable charades.

Day 4- Wednesday, Rest in Bethany

• While reading and discussing the Parable of the Ten Virgins, burn two lamps: one with oil, and the other with very little oil. Turn off all the lights and burn both lamps until the foolish virgin's lamp burns out.

Day 5- Thursday, The Last Supper and Jesus' Prayer and Agony in Gethsemane

• Taste and discuss some ritual foods of Passover or basic foods of Jesus' time and place (unleavened bread, fish, honeycomb, dates, figs, goat cheese, etc).

• Sing the atonement hymn you've been practicing all week.

Day 6- Friday, Jesus' Trial and Crucifixion

• Craft a crown of thorns from a rose bush or other thorny branches.

• Obtain a heavy wooden beam and try to carry it.

• Taste the difference between water and vinegar.

• Turn out all the lights for the evening to signify the 3 hours of darkness in the Old World and the 3 days in the New World (Matt. 27:45, 3 Nephi 8:20-23).

Day 7- Saturday, The Jewish Sabbath

• Prepare the dough for Resurrection Rolls for breakfast tomorrow morning. (Another recipe here)

Day 8- Easter Sunday, Jesus' Resurrection

• Hold a sunrise devotional. Sing the resurrection hymn you've been practicing all week. Read the biblical account of Christ's resurrection. Share your testimonies.

• Tell the Easter story in plastic eggs as you eat your Easter dinner!
Other ideas: dye Easter eggs, have an egg hunt, deliver Easter baskets to neighbors, family and friends, check your area for a chick hatchery to watch baby chickens hatch before your eyes.

I hope you enjoy some of these activities and making new traditions with your family. Christ lives! Have a happy week!

-Deanna